Managing public speaking anxiety & stress
From a social neuroscience perspective, what we call “anxiety” is often just our threat detection system being overly cautious. The key is creating psychological safety for yourself before you create it for others. Self-Compassion is your friend!
1. Self-compassion before public speaking
I always remind myself that feeling nervous is part of being human, part of being excited to perform, not a personal failing. I speak to myself with the same kindness I’d offer a friend facing the same challenge. By doing this, we activate our care system rather than our threat system.
Stealing from the work of psychologist Paul Gilbert:
Our care system, activated by kindness, connection and safety, creating emotions like warmth and can even broaden our thinking which opens us up to learning!
2. You can teach an old dog new tricks! Neuroplasticity in action
Every time we speak publicly, we’re literally rewiring your brain to become more comfortable with it. I frame each speaking opportunity as building stronger neural pathways, not just delivering content. There is no such thing as practice makes perfect in neuroscience. With neuroplasticity, ‘practice makes permanent’, which sounds both more optimistic, and contains more self-agency.
3. Breathwork to calm us
The Vagus nerve responds beautifully to extended exhales. My go-to is 4 counts in through my nose, and 6 counts out out of my mouth, repeated several times. This physiologically shifts us from our threat detection system (sympathetic (fight/flight/freeze/fawn) to parasympathetic activation (which slows our heart rate and promotes “rest and digest”). It’s a beautiful example of how psychological and physiological interventions can work together!
4. Embodied presence
Your physiology affects your psychology. I use power posing before presentations and maintain open, grounded body language throughout. This isn’t just for the audience – it signals confidence to your own nervous system.
Thank you Carol Dweck: Growth mindset application
Instead of “I must perform flawlessly,” it becomes “I’m here to share value and learn from the experience.” This shift reduces pressure and increases curiosity.
Building authentic confidence
Having worked with professionals across law firms like Slaughter & May, banks like Barclays, and institutions like The Moller Institute, I’ve learned that authentic confidence comes from alignment, not perfection.
Leverage your strengths
Rather than trying to be someone else on stage, I help clients identify what makes them uniquely valuable. Your Emergenetics® profile, your lived experience, your perspective – these are your superpowers.
Insight provided by: Anna Marsdern, Communications Trainer & Coach